Encourage women to binge.
Most nutritionists recommend
taking pills or full-blown eating disorders.
Have a few cocktails,
beware of gyms and
go to choosemyplate.gov.
We can all take a cue from them.
I was afraid I’d gain weight if I quit.
Masochistic fitness regimes
constantly yo-yoed between unhappy sluts.
I woke to black flak and diet slip-ups.
You can never really be at peace with your body
but you can eat whatever you want.
Maximize calorie burn and muscle tears.
Take a new class and
slow your progress (a good ballpark is 1,800 shin splints).
Studies show:
women were miserable;
including Jessica Biel.
